Manifesting Our Dreams and the Blocks that Hold Us Back
Recently, I hosted an event which was facilitated by Erica Venegas, a life coach and owner of Blossom Coaching. Our topic of focus was manifestation, and we explored the unconscious and conscious blocks that can hinder us from living our dream lives. For some people, the word "manifestation" might be unfamiliar. But for myself, manifestation is, quite simply, the process of consciously creating what we desire.
The diverse group of twelve women who gathered that morning were hoping to manifest, or call in, so many different things into their lives: a partner, more satisfying work that's aligned with their life purpose, a modified framework for their business that is more community-oriented, and a smooth transition in moving to another country. Because of the level of engagement, the depth of sharing and excitement in the room, the four-hour workshop flew by. Afterwards, I realized the power of sharing my dreams and also being a witness to the dreams of others.
For each of us, including myself, delving further into what was preventing us from manifesting the specific outcome, revealed within us a limiting belief that prevented each of us from moving forward. Oftentimes, what I've noticed is that there's an underlying feeling of unworthiness, the idea that we somehow don't deserve something that we desire. Or there's a fear of what life would actually look like if we made the change we so desire. However, if we use our imaginations, we can realize how much untapped potential we have to create these changes in our lives.
I believe we're all conscious creators. I'm not saying that if you simply think of a new house or car, you can magically manifest it. However, I believe that there's real power in using your imagination to dream of what you want. It's important to see—and more importantly—feel into the energy of what you want to create is a starting point.
Out of the twelve of us, four women (myself included) were hoping to manifest a life partner. Since I'm currently working on this myself, it's somewhat challenging to write about it and also definitely don't feel like I'm in a place to advise on how to do this; however, I do have a few observations.
I always return to the Rumi quote: "Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."
Love and partnership is a tricky thing because it's not only about what you want to manifest but also being in alignment with another person who has similar hopes, dreams and desires for partnership (and life in general). One woman, who attended our first manifestation workshop, had already tapped into the power of manifestation. She landed a new job in eight weeks. During this workshop, she hoped to explore and uncover her relationship blocks.
Although she hasn't been in a relationship for a few months, she didn't feel that there were any blocks, and she was curious as to why the relationship hadn't manifested. She knew that she was worthy of a relationship, but she didn't know why it wasn't happening. At the same time, earlier in the workshop, she mentioned that she's often attracted to people who reflect something that she's missing within herself. I thought that was an interesting comment and one of the blocks that could be preventing her from finding a relationship.
My personal belief is that we can't look for anyone, outside of ourselves, to make us feel whole or to provide us something that we're lacking. I understand her dilemma because I think I've felt similarly in the past. When I wasn't secure in my creative endeavors, I was always attracted to people who I deemed as more creative than me. However, these individuals who are more creative than me might not align with being a good partner.
The woman in the workshop was attracted to people who were self-assured and confident, and again, there's nothing wrong with being attracted to a confident person. However, I also believe we need to possess and embody the traits we admire in others. We also have to be an energetic match for the person we want to call in, so it's important to cultivate all the traits you're looking for and value in a partner within yourself. It is also important to question whether those specific characteristics actually equate to a solid life partner.
Another common theme I noticed is how important it is to reflect on your 'story' and how limiting beliefs show up in that story which could also prevent you from attaining your goals or manifesting your dreams. Another woman shared an experience about how her parents' relationship impacted her ideas of love and desire for relationships. For some women, myself included, we saw our mothers devote their entire lives to their children without continuing to pursue their own dreams and desires. My mother's story impacted me because it made me want to fully live out my creative passions, but now I'm reaching a more nuanced position about this, recognizing that creativity and a loving partnership can coexist.
As it relates to the stories that we create in our minds, at the end of the workshop, Erica took us through a simple, yet powerful exercise by Byron Katie called The Work. In this exercise, you essential examine and uncover whether or not something is true. When reviewing your potentially harmful storylines, it's so important to ask yourself whether any of these thoughts are actually true.
By the end of the workshop, I was reminded that it's not just about what you're trying to create that you need to explore. You also really need to examine and address what's holding you back, including all the damaging storylines and limiting beliefs. What I've come to believe is that to consciously manifest in our lives involves a commitment to the work as well as a belief in the magic of our imagination.
Learn more about Erica Venegas and Blossom Coaching here.
